Health

Thinking is the root of all suffering. – Joseph Nguyen

In the Buddhist parable of the two arrows, a man walking through a forest is struck by a hunter’s arrow and left wounded and alone. The first arrow reflects the real pain of being struck.  But the second arrow represents all the worries and anxieties that follow. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice. The difference lies in whether we fight, deny, and ask “why me?”, or pause, accept reality as it is, and respond with kindness and compassion.

Thank you, creator of souls, for this incredible life of abundance. May joy stay with me throughout the day, for me to learn more each day as an observer without judgment of all my fellow humans. – John Paul DeJoria

Action absorbs anxiety. – Dan Harris

When you fixate on winning, losing, or some other external outcome, it takes you out of the present moment. You become fragile. It’s impossible to enter a flow state. But when you adopt a mindset of curiosity and growth, it relieves pressure and helps you stay anchored. – Brad Stulberg

I used to think anxiety would stop at a number.

Not a specific number at first, just more. More than I had. When I got there, I’d feel safe. I was sure of it.

It doesn’t work that way. When I had X, I needed Y. When I had Y, I needed Z. I have more now than I ever thought I’d have, but a revenue dip or a stressful situation still triggers the same alarm it always did.

Here’s what I’ve come to understand: the thirst for certainty is a moving target. For me, nothing fully satisfies that need because it was never really about achieving a specific goal. It was about controlling the situation, and that’s an impossible illusion to maintain.

The story I told my friends and family was that I had to do it all. I had to juggle all the balls. I had to be responsible for everyone and everything, and if I couldn’t control the outcome, well, that was something to avoid at all costs, because the shame and embarrassment that accompanied failure would be unbearable.

I don’t have this solved. I’m not writing from the other side. But I think naming it honestly is part of the work. The anxiety will always latch onto the next thing if you let it, but what if there is no target to hit, no score to achieve? A fulfilling life should be about variety, learning, growth, and contribution. This is what I’d say to anyone living with the affliction of certainty, especially me. – Dad