My name is Tucker and this little project is really just a record for my kids who at this exact moment have zero interest in listening to anything Dad has to say. It's a simple collection ....
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When you fixate on winning, losing, or some other external outcome, it takes you out of the present moment. You become fragile. It’s impossible to enter a flow state. But when you adopt a mindset of curiosity and growth, it relieves pressure and helps you stay anchored. – Brad Stulberg
There is a very formative moment for many young people where, once you start to get into more serious rooms, you quickly realize just how human everyone is.
Many of the “accomplished elders” who seem put together and like they have it all figured out, are in reality, also still trying to figure it out. They know a lot, they have reps and experience, but things like insecurity and imposter syndrome tend to stick around.
Many older men aren’t used to being challenged in any way and as a result, can react poorly to it.
Many people put on a facade of having it figured out when they are just as unsure of the future as I am.
Many people struggle to show vulnerability or admit when they don’t know or feel backed into a corner.
These are human characteristics, and regardless of power, access, or experience, they seem to stick around. – Adam Mockler
I used to think anxiety would stop at a number.
Not a specific number at first, just more. More than I had. When I got there, I’d feel safe. I was sure of it.
It doesn’t work that way. When I had X, I needed Y. When I had Y, I needed Z. I have more now than I ever thought I’d have, but a revenue dip or a stressful situation still triggers the same alarm it always did.
Here’s what I’ve come to understand: the thirst for certainty is a moving target. For me, nothing fully satisfies that need because it was never really about achieving a specific goal. It was about controlling the situation, and that’s an impossible illusion to maintain.
The story I told my friends and family was that I had to do it all. I had to juggle all the balls. I had to be responsible for everyone and everything, and if I couldn’t control the outcome, well, that was something to avoid at all costs, because the shame and embarrassment that accompanied failure would be unbearable.
I don’t have this solved. I’m not writing from the other side. But I think naming it honestly is part of the work. The anxiety will always latch onto the next thing if you let it, but what if there is no target to hit, no score to achieve? A fulfilling life should be about variety, learning, growth, and contribution. This is what I’d say to anyone living with the affliction of certainty, especially me. – Dad
Tony Robbins’ 6 Human Needs are the core emotional drivers behind all human behavior: Certainty, Uncertainty/Variety, Significance, Love/Connection, Growth, and Contribution. Everyone prioritizes these needs differently, which shapes their personality, actions, and decisions. The first four are considered needs of the personality, while the last two are needs of the spirit.
All of life is a series of daring explorations from a secure base. – John Bowlby
One of the biggest things I’ve learned is not to beat myself up about having downtime or slow days at work. There are days when you feel like you’ve conquered everything. Then all of a sudden, something happens to your car, and now you can’t get to work. I think people think that’s an obstacle to get over, but if you stop, you realize the universe is slowing you down for a reason. – Dr. Jason Wersland
